Our Freedom

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I think that we don't often stop to consider how blessed we are in this country to be allowed the freedom to educate our children at home. Even in those states where we have to jump through way too many hoops, we are allowed to discern what is best for our children. I received an email recently from a friend who is temporarily living in Germany. She was asking us for prayers. In part, she wrote:

If you have a few minutes, I wanted to ask for your prayers over a serious situation in the city of Hamburg. A German family here has been trying to homeschool their six children. The authorities have now arrested the father and an application is in to take custody of the children which would apply in all the EU countries. From what I understand they are strong Christians and have been trying to fight the German laws in order to homeschool their children for several years. The father even attended the university here and got a teaching degree in order to try to make it work. Here is a news account.
It was difficult for us to read because it shows how serious the problems are here in Germany, especially with the mindset of the authorities.

So, if you could say some prayers that would be great. We feel so sorry for parents who want so much to not have to send their children into the German school system here but have no choice.

And add a prayer of gratitude for the many freedoms we have...

The Plan for Mary Beth

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Mary Beth turns ten this fall and it promises to be a very big year for her. Truth be told, all curriculum plans aside, Mary Beth's biggest lessons will be those she learns helping to care for a new baby.  She was six the last time we had an infant in the house.  That baby--Katie--is her pride and joy and her constant companion.  Together, they are both going to so love caring for this new sister.

Mary Beth is a big fan of Catholic Heritage Curriculum.  She loves Language of God, handwriting, and the speller.  She drinks up the Catholic readers in big gulps.  The infusion of faith truly touches her heart.  So, she'll have a steady supply of those.

I'm so impressed with all things published by Hillside Education.  Mary Beth is still working through Stories with a View and enjoying it.  We'll pull some lessons from Primary Language Lessons as needed.  Those needs present themselves in the context of something real and meaningful for her:  blogging.

Her real writing progress is happening somewhere hidden.  She has a private blog and a circle of friends who both visit her blog and provide a wonderful example of fine writing at their blogs.  Every day, all of her own volition, she writes journal entries.  Following her big brother's example, she's even attempting to write a novel!  The only rule is that she is to edit with me before  she posts.  This is an incredibly meaningful and effective way to teach composition.

Much like her mother and her brother, she's not all that enamored of math.  The Math-U-See videos exasperate her. So, we're dialing back a bit.  She'll use some of the manipulatives her little siblings are using, but with a big kid twist.  We're planning to work through Multiplication and Division with Rod Patterns and Graph Paper and to make good use of our well-worn Math-It Kit. She'll also share Touchmath materials with Christian.  One way or another, she'll multipy and divide this year.

For religious studies I'm looking very forward to reading St. Patrick's Summer, The First Christians, and A Life of Our Lord for Children with her. These treasures have recently been re-published by Sophia Institute Press.  She'll narrate as we go and I know there will be plenty of discussion.  She has been devoted to the Catechesis of the Good Shepherd since she was tiny and we are eagerly awaiting Moira Farrell's third book.

She's already put all the Catholic Mosaic books on the shelf and is creating her own liturgical year notebook.  This is a child for whom literature-based learning is perfect!

I am determined to follow through on plans to learn to sew with her.  We are going to begin with Sewing with St. Anne. I inherited it from a friend who bought it sight unseen.  She found that there was nothing in it that she didn't already know and wasn't equipped to teach her daughter.  I, on the other hand, really need a basic, beginner's book like this.  And even with it, I will be constantly begging the intercession of St. Anne.

For art, her biggest brother will teach drawing lessons and we will all enjoy the art included in CHC's fourth grade lesson plans. Because of strict no-sharing policies, I can't use the plans for everyone and I'm not doing a different picture study for each of seven children, so we'll just use the prints and we'll all appreciate the art together.

Unit studies round out the plan.  It's not difficult to get her to add to our family nature blog or to draw for her own nature journal.  She loves historical fiction and has created her own impressive reading list.  I'll add to it as we study history units.

She's as physically gifted as her brothers are.  She plays a very competitive game of backyard soccer.  But, for our own sanity, we have strict policy of limiting "extra-curriculars" to one activity.  We do everything we can to help the children pursue that one passion as deeply as they desire.  And we have found that they tend to be very committed.  Mary Beth is no exception. Last Christmas she was the youngest child to dance Clara in her dance school's history.  She loves to dance! This fall will be full of rehearsals for this year's Christmas performances and she will be at the studio for three or four classes week. She's made it very clear though, that she wants those classes loaded into two days only.  There are going to be two little sisters at home and she doesn't want to miss these fleeting little sister days...

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How's that for ironic?

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The school year is not going to start as planned.  I've gotten distracted.  I am distracted by a series of books that I purchased to help me better understand Attention Deficit Disorder.  I have been derailed and distracted by Delivered from Distraction!

It all began innocently enough.  I was feeling sick late one afternoon and began to channel surf to distract myself from the nausea.  I happened upon EWTN and Johnette Benkovich was talking to Ned Hallowell, author of several books on ADD and crazy-busyness in general.  His descriptions of ADD adults so fit a person I dearly love that I stopped clicking the remote and listened.  My newly diagnosed teenager wandered in. He listened.  The show ended; I went to the computer; the books were on their way in minutes.

One thing I knew before the show was that I needed to spend some time thinking about how to structure Christian's day, week, year so that he has the necessary support.  But I also know that there are other people in my household who need serious structure.  And I had a sense these books could help me to help them.  So, instead of starting the school year and then scrapping the program after reading the books, I decided to take another week, read the books, and start really well prepared.  The neighborhood kids don't start until next week anyway.

For me, the most riveting point that Dr. Hallowell made was that we are not to strive for independence.  Instead, we need healthy interdependence.  The ADD adult needs support people. The wife of a man with ADD can foster healthy interdependence and really be an asset to her husband.  There is difference between supporting and enabling though (and I'm still reading to learn more about that).  As I pondered this whole dynamic of interdependence and I thought about countless struggles to "fix" or "change" those very prounounced ADD tendencies, it occurred to me that part of the vocation of a woman whose husband has ADD might just be to fill that support role in a deliberate, tangible way. Similarly, the mother of a child with ADD needs to look not so much towards making him tow the line like everybody else but to embrace how he is wired an dharness that uniqueness for something good. My role is to coach and to do what I can do to make home as structured for success as possible.

Dr. Hallowell also makes the point that just as there is true ADD (a neurological condition), there is envronmentally induced pseudo-ADD.  The environment in which we live--to which we are wired--feeds frenetic activity, muti-tasking, and distractiblity.  We are Crazy Busy: Overbooked, Overstretched and About to Snap. I'm just guessing here (haven't read that book yet), but an ADD individual living in a crazy-busy world might not be the best scenario for success.

The last nine months have been slow.  Really, really slow.  Every time I think I can add things in, up the busyness factor, God slows me down.  This morning, my son Stephen told a friend of mine that he wasn't going to play travel soccer this fall because that would really make mom pass out.  It's a little extreme but the truth is that every busy day we have had has been followed by two or three "pass out" days. I have spent nine months saying, "I can't."  And every time I'm forced to dial back, I ask what God is trying to teach me.  Now, close to the end (please Lord) of this extreme form of reminding to slow down, I am beginning to understand that crazy busy isn't ever going to do any of us any good and little and hidden needs to be my way of life well past this baby's birthday. I truly believe that the success and the happiness of this family depends on my ability to take seriously these principles of Dr. Hallowell's in my own life:

10 Key Principles to Managing Modern Life

Do what matters most to you (the most common casualty of an excessively busy life):
Don't spread yourself too thin - you must choose, you must prioritize.  In order to both do well and to be happy, you must say , "No thank you," to many projects, people and ideas.  "Cultivate your lilies and get rid of your leeches."

Create a positive emotional environment wherever you are:
When the emotional atmosphere is less than positive, people lose flexibility, the ability to deal wtih ambiguity and complexity, trust, enthusiasm, patience, humor, and creativity.  When you feel safe and secure, you feel welcomed and appreciated, you think better, behave better, and are better able to help others.

Find your rhythm:
Get in the "zone", follow your "flow" - research has proven that this state of mind elevates all that you do to its hightest level.  When you find your rhythm, you allow your day to be taken care of by the automatic pilot in your brain, so the creative, thinking part can attend to what it is uniquely qualified to attend to.

Invest your time wisely so as to get maximum return:
Try not to let time be stolen from you or let yourself fritter it away - use the Time Value Assessment to guide you in what to add, preserve, cut back on, and eliminate.

Don't waste time screensucking (a modern addiction - the withdrawal of looking at a computer/BlackBerry/etc. screen):
Break the habit of having to be near your computer at all times by changing your environment or structure - move your screen to a different room; schedule an amount of time you are allowed to be on the computer; plan mandatory breaks.

Identify and control the sources of gemmelsmerch in your environment:
Gemmelsmerch, the force that distracts a person from what he or she wants to or ought to be doing, is as pervasive and powerful as gravity.

Delegate:
Delegate what you don't like to do or are not good at if you possibly can.  Your goal should be not to be independent, but rather effectively interdependent.  You do for me and I do for you - this is what makes life possible.

Slow down:
Stop and think.  As yourself, what's your hurry?  Why wake up, alrady impatient, and rush around and try to squeeze in more things than you should, thereby leading you to do all of it less well?  Your hurry is your enemy.

Don't multitask ineffectively (avoid frazzing):
Give one task your full attention.  You will do it better.  You may eventually get so good at it that your conscious mind can attend to other aspects of the task other than menial ones.  This is the only way a human can multitask effectively.

Play:
Imaginatively engage with what you are doing.  This will bring out the best part of your mind, focus you on your task, and make you more effective and efficient.